Umbrella Memories
by TheWitchBaby
Summary: It didn't seem so important. It was just an offer of aid to an injured man. Nothing more then a dime store umbrella, now falling apart and no longer useful. But to Kanou, it was everything. Implied Yaoi but no smex. FLUFFY LIKE UNICORNS! :D
1. Chapter 1

Umbrella Memories

By: Witch Baby

_**A/N: **I think there are one or two fics out there that mention Kanou and Ayase's first meeting. I've read a few though none I can exactly remember at the moment. Anyway, here is my version... well, I guess it's really not the first meeting, but more a flashback... oh well, just read the damn thing...And remember to review too! :3_

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There was no argument in the fact that Ayase loved to clean. Kanou would hire a whole legion of maids should Ayase ask it of him, but even after four years the blond was happiest when down on his hands and knees, scrubbing floors. Kanou couldn't understand it, but if it made Ayase happy, then Kanou had no room to complain.

For Ayase, it was a mental thing. Cleaning ones physical space equaled cleaning out ones mental space as well. He did his best thinking washing pots or folding laundry. Making sense of the chaos that a messy bedroom could be, it made him proud of himself.

Today was one of those heavy cleaning days. Kanou, having neglected his duties the day before to stay home and _'spend quality time with Ayase'_, was now having an extended afternoon at the office. Likewise, due to such _'quality time'_, the kitchen had been neglected and Ayase hated having dirty dishes left in the sink. And once he was on a roll, he couldn't stop himself. That was why he currently found himself deep within the confines of his and Kanou's shared closet, throwing out unnecessary things that they both had gathered over the last year.

Kanou always teased Ayase about keeping things. The blond knew that he maybe put a little too much sentimental value in a lot of his belongings, but at least he could be organized. Kanou never could get through with cleaning, getting distracted by old papers or photographs. Ayase had ceased asking for his help long ago and instead waited for afternoons much like this one, where he could do it himself.

Though, as he stood on the tips of his toes to reach a box on the top closet shelf, he wished Kanou was there, just so that he could take advantage of the mans tall stature. It was so difficult to get things done when half the things that he needed to go through where just out of his reach. Huffing in irritation, he struggled to reach the box, fingertips barely brushing the side._ 'Just...a little...more...'_

"Ah!" Ayase tumbled backwards off the chair, the box falling behind and dumping on top of him and the floor. The blond hissed in pain as the clutter bounced off his head, as well as the sting in his backside that was sure to receive disapproving looks from Kanou once he caught sight of the bruises. Standing, he stretched out his protesting muscles, rubbing at the abused skin with a slight wince. Sighing, he bent to retrieve the spilled contents of the box.

All of it seemed to be Kanou's things. Some scattered papers, a few books and magazines. Nothing too important that Ayase had to worry about prying into something he shouldn't. He tried to stay far away from Kanou's other life, for more his own sake then anything else. Things had calmed down in the years following their first encounter. The threats had stopped, their enemies defeated. Understanding was something that Ayase would always be thankful for. The day that Kanou had given in and forgiven his debts, was the day Ayase had promised he would stay with the man. It was also the first time Kanou had ever said he loved him.

Ayase's chest warmed at the thought. It had been a rough road to get to where they were now, but Ayase couldn't picture himself anywhere else.

Smiling, he organized the papers as neatly as he could, put a paperclip on them, and set them back into the box. Kanou could look through it himself later and decide what was junk and what was not. He gathered the books and magazines, sorting them out and putting them away as well, before looking around for anything he missed.

Ah, there was something, half tucked under the bed where it had rolled after it had fallen. Bending down, he picked it up from its hiding spot. He quizzically looked at the object, confused by why it would be tucked away with Kanou's things. An umbrella? Really?

It was a small thing, light blue in color. Faded now by being tucked away for such a long time. There was a few rips in the fabric too, the handle worn and splintering. Why would Kanou keep such an old, useless thing? Turning it in his hand, he eyes widened in surprise at some very familiar handwriting on the handle.

_'Property of Yukiya Ayase'_

This umbrella... was his? He didn't remember owning such a thing recently. However, it did look pretty old. But then, why would Kanou have it? Ayase sat down cross legged on the the bed, the umbrella clutched in his hand as he tried to remember. When had this old thing been his? And how had Kanou gotten a hold of it?

The convince store. The memory suddenly popped in his head. The little corner store a few blocks away from his old apartment had been having a sale. He had stopped in for dinner groceries, and had purchased it. He had remembered because he was relieved to find a blue one, all the others had been a bright pink, and the forecast had threatened for rain all that afternoon. Sure enough, as he had stepped outside, the sky had opened up and began to pour out mercilessly into the world.

But... that still didn't explain why Kanou had it...

He closed his eyes, mouth setting into a thin line as he struggled to remember...

_It had been cold, so very cold that night. And the rain, while beautiful, was doing funny things to his mood. There was something sad about walking in the rain and going home to an empty house. He had tried to distract himself with thoughts of the delicious dinner he would make, or exams coming up in school. A friend had invited him out tonight, but he'd had to decline, again. He knew a 14 year old should be able to go out and have fun. But those 14 year old kids had families._

_At the time, Ayase hadn't had anyone._

_A noise from the ally had distracted him. For a second, he thought it might be one of the stray cats that hung around the neighborhood. But it sounded too big, the growl too deep, to be an ordinary cat. A dog then? Peeking behind the dumpster in the alleyway way, he saw a person._

_Panic screamed to life. Was this person dead? Had he stumbled upon a murder of some sort?_

_Then he remembered the groan, the pain in that animistic sound. The person wasn't dead (thank the Gods), but he could be seriously hurt. Stepping forward, he shifted his umbrella to shield the stranger from the pouring rain."Excuse me? Are you all right?"_

_It seemed like forever before the man had lifted his head, bruises and cuts on his cheek, the water from the rain running pink with blood. Ayase shivered in fear, though he did his best to smile in reassurance. "Do you need some help? You look like you're wounded."_

"_W-who...are you?" the man asked, a note of awe in his voice as his eyes, slightly glazed, looked up at Ayase._

"_My name is Yukiya Ayase. What is yours?"_

_The stranger shook his head. "Doesn't matter..." he mumbled quietly, leaning back against the wall tiredly. _

_Ayase bit his lip, indecisive about what to do. At least the man didn't seem mortally wounded, but he was still pretty beat up and bleeding. His attitude said he wanted to be left alone, but Ayase would feel bad for leaving him. "My apartment is only a little ways away, I have a medical kit there. If you would like, I could bandage up your wounds."_

_The strangers eyes opened, looking a little clearer then before. His gaze was intense, calculating, and guarded. "What do you want?"_

_Ayase frowned in confusion. "Want? Nothing. You're hurt and it would be wrong of me to just leave you. And it's pouring outside, you could get sick and... and worse..."_

_The stranger smirked. "I could be some crazy person kid, are you sure you wanna invite me to your house? What would your parents think?"_

_Ayase's eyes flashed sadness for a moment. "I live alone," he said quietly. "And... if you were a bad person, you wouldn't warn me now, would you?"_

_He smiled softly at the stranger, extending his hand. "If you want to, how about it? No one should be walking around alone tonight. Especially if they're hurting."_

_The man continued to gaze at him for a moment more, before something in his eyes softened. Ayase released the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "All right," he agreed softly, struggling to get to his feet, "I think I'd like that..."_

_The stranger hadn't said much else for the rest of the night. Ayase had filled the silence with idled chatter about his life and hobbies as he had patched up the mans wounds and cooked them dinner. His mood had brightened at having the company, as quiet as he was. Especially when the man had asked for a second, then third helping of his stew. He loved to cook and have others enjoy his food._

_The man too, had seemed to relax, eyes following Ayase silently as the younger male bustled around the apartment. Ayase had offered the stranger a place to sleep for the night, but he had declined. The blond was a little sad to see him go, but handed him a coat, and then the light blue umbrella he'd been holding before. "The coat might be a little small for you, it was my fathers. But it's warm and should keep you dry."_

"_Thank you." he responded softly, taking the umbrella and holding it carefully._

_For the tiniest of moments, Ayase felt as if the large male before him looked competently lost. Maybe even sad too. "I'm sorry if I sound forward but...if you need help again you can stop by anytime..."_

_The stranger smiled, almost bitterly. "I'll keep that in mind."_

_They stood in the doorway, neither of them moving. The suddenly, the man's hand reached out to softly brush his fingers against Ayase's cheek. The blond was surprised, though stopped himself from flinching under the sudden touch. "Good night then, Ayase." he said softly, turning away._

_Ayase stood in the doorway, watching the stranger quickly disappear into the night. "Goodbye..." he answered softly into the empty dark._

Ayase sat on the bed, clutching the umbrella, simply staring at it for the longest time. Only one man could say his name in such a way that it left him shivering. Why hadn't he remembered this before? That was the moment that Kanou wouldn't tell him about. Their first meeting.

The moment Kanou fell in love.

It didn't seem so important. It was just an offer of aid to an injured man. Nothing more then a dime store umbrella, now falling apart and no longer useful. But Kanou had kept it. For eight years he'd carried it with him, had attached it to a memory of Ayase at 14, who had extended a warm hand to a complete stranger. He knew Kanou enough now to realize how precious that moment must have been. He knew such acts of selflessness where rare for Kanou, and looking back it must have been hard for Kanou to push away his distrust, and allow another person to help him.

He had let Ayase in and allowed the younger male to see him at his worst. He hadn't known it at the time, and it had taken him four more years after they had met again, for Ayase to realize how precious that trust was. It didn't make all of Kanou's decisions right, but for a moment, Ayase felt like he could understand them a little bit better.

When Kanou arrived home that night, it was to an unusually quiet Ayase. Kanou was practically squirming at the dinner table as Ayase silently contemplated his soup. His angel was rarely this subdued anymore, and it worried him. "Ayase? Is something wrong? Did something happen?"

Eyes that had refused to meet his suddenly looked up, pinning him with an intense gaze. Kanou had the sudden urge to run, but pushed it down to equally stare back. Ayase wasn't hurt or angry, the older male could see that. Mostly he seemed thoughtful, as if he was trying to figure something out.

When Ayase finally looked away, Kanou relaxed slightly, uncomfortable under such scrutiny from his angel. "Will you please tell me whats wrong?" Kanou huffed. He always tried his best to be patient with Ayase, but he hated secrets.

Ayase smiled softly, shaking his head. "I'm sorry Kanou, I was just thinking."

"About what?"

Ayase stood and leaned over the table to give Kanou a soft kiss on his cheek. "Nothing important." he assured, "At least, not anymore."

As Kanou's control snapped at such a display of affection, and he dragged Ayase to their bedroom, the blond couldn't help but smile. The man could be so predictable in his relentlessness to have his way , but that was okay. It was that predictability, that Ayase secretly loved best. "I never took you for the sentimental type." he murmured softly.

"What?"

"Nothing." Ayase said with a smile, letting himself be lost in Kanou's kisses.

If Kanou wanted to stubbornly cling to something as simple as an umbrella, who was Ayase to stop him? Someday, he'd tell Kanou he remembered, but for now, he had better things to do.

**The End**

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**_A/N: _**_I have no idea what I just wrote. I'm not ever sure it's any good. What the hell?_

_Read and review people! It's how the plot bunnies are fed!_


	2. Chapter 2

Umbrella Memories

By: Witch Baby

_**A/N:** I was originally just gonna leave it a one-shot, but I really wanted to put something from Kanou's perspective. I hope I didn't make it too OOC, but my vision of Kanou and Ayase for the future is one with Ayase a little more confident and Kanou a little more soft. I hope I made it work... Surprisingly, no smut again... YOUR VIRGIN EYES ARE SAFE! _

"Ayase, whats this?"

The blond turned at the questioning tone of his lover, looking over at the small pile of bags and boxes tucked away into a corner of the living room. The younger male smiled. "Well, seeing as how you were, thankfully, otherwise preoccupied yesterday, I was finally allowed to get some cleaning done."

Kanou frowned to hide his smile at the blonds teasing tone. It was still amazing, the change he could see in Ayase. No longer the scared and weak youth he had first laid eyes on, what greeted him every morning was a confident and compelling young man. Yet, still just as caring and sweet, despite all the things that had happened between them. "I still say it wasn't my fault that I was so _distracted_ the day before."

A blush instantly bloomed on the blonds face, and he turned quickly to hide it. Kanou smirked at his ability to still make his angel squirm like that, ever after four years. "W-well, regardless of that, I need you to go through all that and decide what you want to keep." Ayase instructed.

Kanou sighed. He really hated cleaning, finding the whole idea tedious and boring. Especially when he thought of so many other things he would rather be doing with his morning. Still, he could deny his precious nothing, and so begrudgingly began to sift through the pile.

"Junk...junk...junk..." he mumbled under his breath, shoving things away with hardly a look, too busy staring at his cute little blond. From this vantage point, he could see right into the kitchen, where Ayase was fixing lunch. It wouldn't be so bad, if he wasn't humming and shaking his sexy little ass to some tune Kanou didn't recognize playing on the kitchen radio. _'This is pure _torture_.'_ he thought, growling in frustration.

His hands then closed around something definitely not a book or paper. He looked down and, in a shock of recognition, forgot everything else. In his hands, was a small, light blue umbrella. His fingers brushed over the worn handle, tracing over the fading, delicate hand writing on the side. It had been forever since he last held this in his hands, thought about the time when his life had changed forever...

"_Just fucking great..."_

_My Gods he could laugh right now if it wasn't so damn pitiful. Of course, it had to rain. On the shittiest day of all his 23 years of life, **it had to fucking rain**. His dad would be tickled to see him, if the bastard was there. His son, bleeding and beaten to a pulp in some alleyway. The asshole would probably just smirk and kick him while he was down._

_Then again, Kanou had brought it upon himself. It had been pretty stupid to provoke that gang of punks while he was unarmed and alone. He'd just been so frustrated and angry, he needed someway to release the tension. Still, he'd held his own all right. It wasn't until they had run off like the scum they where that he realized that they had messed him up pretty bad. _

_He struggled to sit up a little better, and growled in pain. One, maybe two ribs where defiantly cracked, and his body felt like one giant bruise. Damn could he go for a cigarette right now._

_His dark eyes closed, exhaustion and pain taking its toll. He knew it was a really bad idea to sleep, especially in this part of town and in the state he was in. But he was just so damn tired. He should probably call someone to pick him up, but the effort to lift his cell from his pocket just seemed too great at the moment. And knowing his luck no one would answer. No one cared where he was or what he did. No one would care if he didn't make it home. He could die, right now in this alley, and there would be no one in the world who would even cry._

_With the pain he was feeling, he wouldn't be surprised if he _was_ dieing. 'Perfect, just fucking perfect.' he thought bitterly, 'Take me now Angel of Death, I'm fucking waiting.'_

_Suddenly, the steady fall of rain that had been beating on his face ceased. Slowly opening his eyes, he looked up into the most beautiful face he had ever seen. Soft, gentle, with skin that seemed to glow in the weak light of the street lamps. "Excuse me. Are you all right?" the stranger asked._

"_W-who... are you?" Kanou asked, dazed by this creature. An Angel, he had to be. He was to perfect to be human. And if this was indeed the Angel of Death, answering his prayers, he'd be willing to jump into the abyss in a heartbeat._

"_My name is Yukiya Ayase. What is yours?"_

_He took a deep breath, scenting a sweet vanilla scent underneath the heavy smell of the rain. He closed his eyes again, letting it clear his head. When he opened them again, he made a careful observation of the male in front of him. Big plain jacket, a warm scarf wrapped around his neck, and a light blue umbrella in his hand, currently sheltering them both from the light rain._

_No, not an Angel, a human. Fuck, he must be more out of it then he thought. "Doesn't matter..." he replied, resting his head against the wall. He was too tired for nosy people._

_There was quiet for a moment, and for a second Kanou thought the younger male had left, until he heard the same soft voice say "My apartment is only a little ways away, I have a medical kit there. If you would like, I could bandage up your wounds."_

_Now that was worth a laugh, if it wouldn't put him in extreme agony from his cracked ribs. Even if he was gonna follow him, did that boy even stop to wonder why he was bleeding and stuck in an ally? He eyed the boy, searching for some type of ill intent. Maybe he recognized Kanou and thought to blackmail his father for money. "What do you want?"_

_The boy looked genuinely confused at his question. "Want? Nothing. You're hurt and it would be wrong of me to just leave you. And it's pouring outside, you could get sick and... and worse..."_

_Kanou gave him another once over. No, Ayase didn't seem the type for scheming. He looked really scared for Kanou even, and that touched something inside the older male. Even those he was close to, those that where supposed to care about him, didn't give a shit. Why would some weak, scared looking boy give a damn?_

_'He must be crazy to try to help me.' Kanou though with a smirk. "I could be some crazy person kid, are you sure you wanna invite me to your house? What would your parents think?"_

_The younger male's enticing blue eyes flashed with pain for the briefest of moments, and Kanou pushed aside the illogical urge to reach out a comforting hand. "I live alone," he said quietly. "And... if you were a bad person, you wouldn't warn me now, would you?"_

_Kanou guessed that was true enough, though it surprised him that Ayase lived by himself. He expected someone so naively trusting to come from one of those deliriously happy, cliched families. Like on TV, with a happily married mom and dad, and brothers and sisters that where close and never fought with one another. _

"_If you want to, how about it?" Ayase asked, extending his hand, "No one should be walking around alone tonight. Especially if they're hurting."_

_He stared at the offered hand, wondering how soft it would be. The long delicate fingers, the perfect pink fingernails. He wanted to touch that hand, he just knew it would be warm. "All right." he found himself saying without thinking, "I think I'd like that."_

_The walk to the apartment was a struggle, Kanou trying to remain upright and walking, without leaning too heavily on the younger male. Ayase never once complained, no matter how many times he had to stop to catch his breath. He only hesitantly rubbed the older male's shoulder, giving him an encouraging smile._

_When they finally made it, Ayase was quick to sit him down and attend to his wounds. It was cute to watch the shy boy from the ally way turn into a busy little housewife. The blond cleaned his scrapes, rubbing in some cooling medicine and taping up his ribs. Kanou was feeling better already, though he contented himself in watching Ayase as he concentrated on cleaning and bandaging every cut._

"_There." he said with a satisfied smile, eyes flickering up to meet Kanou's in a warm gaze, "I think that should do it. Are you hungry?"_

_Kanou nodded, and without another word Ayase took his hand and led him into the kitchen area of his small apartment. The taller male was sure he could move on his own now, though when offered the warmth of the smaller male's hand, he found it hard to refuse it. _

_Something as simple as another persons touch, Kanou should have been freaking out at the thrill it gave him. Instead, he contented to watch the sweet stranger move around his kitchen, retelling tales of his family and friends. Kanou didn't miss how most of those he talked about where spoken in a past tense, and Kanou found himself frowning. It was okay if he was alone; he was a no good son of a twisted yakuza boss. He had no friends, didn't want friends. Friends were a weakness._

_Ayase was so different from that. He was bright, and sweet. Innocent in a way only few people are in this world, with a quite understanding about him that was like a balm to Kanou's tattered nerves. He deserved a loving family and good friends. As Ayase sets a bowl of something delicious smelling in front of him, Kanou wonders what it would be like to know Ayase. Really know him._

_He drew the line at staying the night. The rain had let up enough, and his wounds didn't hurt as badly. Gods only knew what would happen should he stay. Ayase seemed reluctant to let him leave, and it caused the warm feeling in his chest to grow. Offering him a jacket and the umbrella, they stood quietly by each other on the small porch. "The coat might be a little small for you, it was my fathers. But it's warm and should keep you dry."_

"_Thank you." he replied, breathing in that vanilla scent and soaking in the warmth he felt emanating from Ayase's delicate body._

_Kanou didn't want to leave, and the knowledge surprised him. He hardly knew this boy, outside of his kind naivety and the few stories he had shared. He was scared to realize how much he'd like to get to know him. How much Ayase felt like coming home when he was already so weak and weary._

"_I'm sorry if I sound forward but...if you need help again you can stop by anytime..."_

_Kanou smiled bitterly, knowing such things were impossible. "I'll keep that in mind."_

_They came from two different worlds, and if Kanou involved himself with Ayase, it would only end in tragedy for the both of them. He was still so young, a fact his father never failed to point out. He was unable to protect himself, let alone someone so precious as Ayase. _

_But maybe one day..._

_On impulse, his hand reached out, tracing the delicate curve of Ayase's cheek. He learned forward, whispering a final farewell. "Good night then, Ayase..."_

_Right then and there, as he disappeared into the cold darkness of night, he made his promise._

Kanou was startled out of his thoughts by a delicate touch to his arm. He looked over to Ayase, those blue eyes he loved so much filled with warmth and affection. "I wasn't sure if you wanted to keep it or not." he said softly, brushing his fingers of the pale blue material.

Kanou's eyes widened in surprise. "Ayase? You... you remembered?"

The younger male blushed, nibbling his lip. "Yes. Yesterday when I found it."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

He shrugged, eyes downcast. "I didn't think it mattered if I remembered or not. I mean, we're still here, together, right? It doesn't make much of a difference."

Kanou smiled, looking down at the simple object that had started something so monumental. He remembered days when he would simply hold it in his hands, remembering the ghost scent of vanilla under a heavy pour of rain, and be reminded why he promised himself to get stronger, to be someone worthy of Ayase.

A flash of guilt tore through him, and he had to look away from Ayase's warm gaze. He had gotten stronger yes, but in the worst ways possible. In the beginning, he only wanted to protect Ayase. Instead, for the longest time he had ended up hurting him. Ayase, of course, had forgiven him, but that didn't make it right. "I know I've said it a million times before,"said quietly, "but I'm sorry for what I've done to you."

Ayase's face softened, and he pulled Kanou down to kiss him chastely on his cheek. "I know."

Cupping Ayase's cheek, he leaned in to give him a deeper kiss, tongue flicking out teasingly across his bottom lip. He smirked as he pulled away, noting the dark blush and lust glazed eyes. Kissing him lightly, he glanced at the umbrella still in his hand. "I don't think I have the heart to throw it out now."

Ayase smiled, chuckling softly. "You're such a softy." he teased, plucking the umbrella from Kanou's hand and setting in the counter.

"Only for you." he replied as Ayase led him to their bedroom, "Only ever for you."

_**A/N:** *chokes on the fluffyness of the fanfic* No more for this! That is it! I can't take much more fluff!_

_Kanou seemed a little OOC in this to me, but whatever. KANOU AND AYASE ARE MY BARBIES! I DO WHAT I WANT! MUAHAHAHAHA!_

_*dragged off by men in white coats* Aw man! Not again! _


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